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Understanding Divorce Mediation and Custody Mediation

What is Divorce and Custody Mediation?

Mediation is a process that helps all parties communicate effectively as they clarify information, better understand each other’s perspectives, develop possible alternatives, explore consequences, and make decisions. The Mediator will not make decisions about “right and wrong” or determine how to resolve the conflict. If both parties choose, the Mediator can prepare a Memorandum of Understanding containing decisions reached in mediation.

Couples get divorced for a reason. Once it is clear that this is to be their path, the focus should turn to the present and to tomorrow, rather than yesterday. Divorce Litigation is all about yesterday.  Mediation is about making tomorrow better. If the split is civil today, it will be easier to focus on themselves and support their kids. Parents can still enjoy being in the same room and can share their kids’ birthdays, graduations and weddings. Rather than live in the past—which each spouse is getting divorced to escape—focus on tomorrow, which is the reason you’re getting divorced… so tomorrow can be better.

Mediation is a confidential process, and the Mediator will not reveal anything discussed in mediation without permission from all parties.

While all of our Mediators are either licensed attorneys or mental health professionals, they cannot provide legal representation or legal advice, counseling or therapy.

Divorce Done Right Styles of Mediation

Divorce Done Right Mediators utilize one of two mediation models to mediate a divorce, or in some cases, a combination of the two. Research has not shown one model to be more effective than the other. The models are known as “transformative” or “facilitative” mediation.

Transformative Mediation is about helping people in conflict change the way they interact with each other – from negative and destructive to more positive and constructive. Mediation participants have an opportunity to gain new information, get clear information and consider options as they make difficult and complicated decisions.

Each participant has an opportunity to have their own voice, express their own needs, and the needs of their children. With meaningful dialogue, one can begin to understand the needs, desires and wishes of the other. Increased understanding of the other supports decision-making that can address the needs of both participants.

Facilitative Mediation is a structured process in which the Mediator guides participants through the process with the goal of reaching a mutually agreeable resolution.

When the Mediator deems it necessary, he/she will ask questions, validate or give perspective on different points of view and search for common interests underlying the positions taken by the participants. The Mediator is in charge of the process while the parties are in charge of the outcome.

They are excellent. Very professional, very knowledgeable about the law & straight to the point. Attorney saw us after hours and took extra time on our first meeting because he wanted to make sure we understood everything. Very happy with this firm.

The mediation process helped to improve our communication leading to better decision making. This decreased the emotional tension in the household so our children were then able to focus on themselves.